Scripture is difficult to interpret often with the belief systems of today. Most of us grew up with a strong urging to respect all authority around us: the age-old parental comeback, “respect is earned.” Parents proceed to list out the ways in which a person shows respect. It is our duty as parents to teach our children what respect looks like. But in our teaching, how often do we follow scripture or a spiritual motivation to reach a greater self? In the teachings of Jesus, he, as usual, plays this game backwards. Respect is not earned but freely given.

Not long before The Last Supper, Jesus gets a basin of water, and with his own clothes as a rag, he washes his disciples’ feet. Understand at this moment what Jesus knows in this room. He knows Judas will betray him, he knows Peter will deny him, he knows that all will mourn him with doubt that he will return. In washing their feet, he gives them the respect of a servant to a master. This is an act of unconditional love. The disciples do not yet understand this demonstration of compassion and feel uncomfortable. But they will experience the love that Jesus knows, only after his death.

This story is one of Jesus’s most powerful teachings. Its message is not to respect people as they are now, but to respect them for what they will become. Prophets and sacred peoples often teach the giving of respect freely as seen in many religious texts beyond Christianity.

This story proves that in the deeper spirit that speaks to all of humanity, respect is something that is given.

As my children have entered school age, respect is a subject that comes up often. My goal is to them to the respect that Jesus taught. When my children try to speak to me with THAT tone — every parent knows THAT tone, the one their sweet angels pick up from the school yard — I remind them of how I speak to them with respect, and that they should do the same for me.

This allows the child or individual to see what respect looks like and to feel what being respected feels like. That allows them to emulate that behavior for themselves and for others.

Children today are extremely perceptive, and they are watching us adults intently. When we disrespect family, because we do not get our way, they see that. When we disrespect others, who do not believe our beliefs, they see that. When we disrespect them, our children, because “respect is earned,” they not only see that, they feel that.

Children are not as different today as previous generations claim. They simply have access to more information. What are they accessing and what does it show them? Kids today want to know what respect is, but they don’t see it. It’s not on the news, TV shows, in our homes, and not always at school. It is our greatest job as parents, and as adults who have children in their lives, to show respect. Show it, they are watching. Speak it, they are listening. Respect is not earned, respect is given, and must be given freely, and often.

Melanie Winter

Melanie is the Director of Marketing and Content Writer for WinternetWeb Technologies.

Melanie writes content for clients to promote marketing and branding in her web development business. She also writes for a blog and local community history projects and publications. She earned a Bachelors from Virginia Tech in Communications, English, and Religion. Melanie also enjoys writing fiction, spending time with her two daughters, antiquing, gardening, and community volunteering.